I suddenly had the urge to blog again. RAWR.

They say, nothing beats the first love. Well, true enough. So I'm going to write my past here. I hardly talk about my private matters here, but I'll just spill some beans about my past since I really feel like blurting it out here. This is going to be cheesy. Ha...ha

My First Love. Petals in the wind.
The moment he asked me, I was dumbfounded. I never expected something like this to happen neither had I expected someone to love and appreciate me for who I am. I couldn't decipher those feelings I felt. Those myriad of feelings are pretty hard to explain. Euphoria was overflowing. I was loved and appreciated. I felt like there were rainbows everywhere, in every part of my life. Life was like rainbows and dandelions. I was enjoying every single second of it.

He never failed to make me smile. He was ever so protective of me. He was caring. He often worries for me. And whenever I'm sad and depressed, he was always there to cheer me up. Once, I fell really ill. So ill that I was unable to get out from bed. And yet, he tried inevitably to make me happy. He would call and SMS me often to see whether I was alright.

I thanked God for giving someone special to me. That special someone was my everything. He was my strength and pillar of hope. Without him, I would be in total darkness. I would be in total oblivion. The love I had for him... was growing everyday. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. From dawn to night I would be thinking of him. I felt that this was like a reverie.

And I can't afford to make this reverie sour. Nothing lasts forever, though. On one faithful day, I bided farewell to him. I finally said goodbye to him. It seemed like our love has dried. Gone. Forever. So I chose this road, and I kept chanting to myself that everything will be OK. I was reluctant to choose this path. I knew I had to stop loving him and I will be able to get over it but not all in one overnight. Perhaps all I needed was time. I took approximately one year to get over him. Frankly speaking, the entire process was agonizing. I would cry to myself and blame myself for choosing this road. How I could I say goodbye to someone whom I love so much? On and off I would regret over this matter. But let bygones be bygones. I've learned to let go of the past and not to dwell in it anymore. Whenever I think of the past, it still hurts me though.

But nothing could ever beat my first love. Not even anyone. He's irreplaceable.

But I'm over with it already. I have moved on >:)