love.

what is love? it is a deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness. then what is infactuation? it is temporary love of an adolescent. we often get mixed up with the word 'infactuation' and 'love'.

love is something which we cannot control. it comes unexpectedly. it happens to anyone. beauty is in the eye of the beholder. love is a special bond between two parties. a feeling which cannot be described. each time when you meet with your crush, you want him/her to have a good impression on you. you will dress up nicely, talk to him/her politely and you will smile sweetly to him/her. well, that is perfectly normal. now, let me write about my so-called fairytale.

i always ask myself, 'does love last forever?'. i seriously dont know the answer for this question. i used to have a crush on someone, whom now is taken. everybody seemed to liked him because he was tall, macho and handsome. all the girls went crazy over him. when i knew that he was taken, my heart was broken. it was shattered into tiny pieces. what can i do? i looked happily in the outside. smiling cheerfully, giggling here and there. but in the inside, i felt hurt and rejected. rejection is like the whole world falling down. my hopes were dead. at that moment i was depressed. i cried over it for days. but now im fully recovered from the past which i have gone through. at first it seemed impossible. but i finally made it through. it was tough forgetting the one i love. i could not let him go. i could not forget the feelings i had for him. it was just too difficult. but i learned to leave everything unto God. take a look at me now, im a total different person. i have learned to put these things down, and thankfully and i am already over with it.

confessions. i wanted to express my feelings to the person whom i had a crush before. but i didnt have the guts. i wasnt brave enough. it is kind of embarassing and humiliating if you actually do that. if lets say he/she turns you down, that is so way humiliating! especially for girls.

im actually stuck right now. teenagers now are like having boyfriends and girlfriends. like a 'trend'. it is like a must have. like you got, i also got. well that kind of thinking is lame. well my parents advised me not to start a relationship right now. because we are still young. we are not mature enough to handle this kind of things, and we might not concentrate on our studies. thus, our studies deteroriate. who wants it to happen like this? definitely nobody.

i wander aimlessly, my white wings outstreched to the edge of the world. all i saw was darkness. hopes dead. shattered in front of my eyes. the tiny bits of it were pierced through my heart. inch by inch, foot by foot,i float closer to nowhere, closer to nothing. a world reveals itself under me, as i observe with lonesome teary eyes. endless it may seem, this empty life was more complete than anything. the illustrious mountain top, with its sprinkle of snow and flurry of forest. emerging from the world beneath my wings, he does not recognize my existence. the mountains stand sedentary, yet tall and proud, his own existence visible. my grasp loosens as i drift further and further to what lies ahead. as time passes by, everything vanished into thin air.