MERDEKA!! Happy 49th Birthday to my beloved Malaysia! I am so proud of you. Happy Independence Day everyone!! ^_^

I've been walking beneath my own shadow. Despite the fact that I had just fought with my best guy friend, I realised that silence seems to be my favourite surrounding. Although I don't really enjoy being in solitude, but I like to be in deep, hush, silence. Hmmm... Life has been really a turnover for me, or to be precise, life has been a rollercoaster ride for me. The major examinations are really near, and I'm getting more worried. The profanity problem has strucked me several times, and now, it is back, doing more harm than good. Sad to say, I have also went astray from God. I seriously hate this, and yet I'm facing this everyday. Life's really depressing at times. There is nowhere I could find solace. My head's bursting anytime, and I feel like I'm going cuckoo. I really need some happy pills (wished they existed).

Although I find joy and happiness in small little ways, well, the feeling of happiness hasn't been there for quite some time already. There are so many things which I dislike and detest. Well, I'm not going to list all of it right as it doesn't sound good. I detest lala people a lot and each time I bump into them, I stare and glare at them nastily (I know that's mean). Urhm, lala people who are nice are exceptional. They don't give me eye sores (; The act of posing uh-so-cute-but-so-dumb pictures has been quite rampant, mostly by girls who cannot get a life. They have raging hormones, and they think they're attractive enough (big ego) to woo guys on the internet. Urgh, how pathetic could that be? I can't stand the disgusting sight of it. They're merely trying to bootlick the guys in the internet by writing them testimonials (to show their appreciation for approving their friend reuqest), hoping that the guys will be flattered for what they've done. That's a very goosy and stupid thing to do. Hrhm. Don't wanna sound too nasty and sarcastic here, so I shall stop.

Alright, back to happier things (Don't wanna sound like sad-faced person who only posts sad stuff on her blog. That's way too pathetic. It's okay to blurt out your problems and sadness in your blog,for once in a awhile, and I understand that. But do not go overboard. It only makes your blog look pitiful.) Tomorrow I'll be going 1 Utama with my dear Andrea and Joyee. Betcha Andrea gonna wear a super duper mini skirt and her Roxy flipflops to unveil her irresistible sexiness and her perfect body shape, mainly to woo some good looking guys's attention (Hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahha xD). No, my mom doesn't know about this and I gave her an excuse saying that I'm following Joyee back home. Well, lotsa things to be done in order to make my plan look and sound perfect. Hope she doesn't find out and if she does find out, I'll be in hot soup. Hmm.. I'm not a naughty teen afterall. I told my dad about it and he agreed. It is not that I did not tell my parents, well, hrmm, I told my dad at least.

Well...I really hope that she'll not find out. Everything will be all right if someone does not interfere with my plan. Hope that everything turns out perfect.

Life's so bloody annoying at times. Hate it when problems come one and after another. Never ending. Don’t wanna go into the details of it. Life just sucks. Sighs.

Proposal : To have a blog website where I keep all my own blog designs

To: Joanne
By: Joanne

Aloha everyone. Yupp, I'll be setting a new blog website where I keep all MY OWN blog designs. Unfortunately, due to the major examinations, there will be a 2-month hiatus. Of course, I need a brainstorm, inspiration, nice artistic pictures and some funky fresh creative ideas (sounds familiar huh? have a look at my msn personal message ^_^) to create a blogskin. One simple blogskin can take up to 1 week (If I don't procrastinate). There will also be screenshots of those blogskins which I have created and a short description about it. Furthermore, blogskin requests are welcomed. Be nice and tell me what you want and I'll design for you. FOC. Yeah yeah, for once I'm being a good samaritan. But don't hasten me to finish it as quick as possible. Remember, patience is bitter but it's fruit is sweet. =)

Proposal accepted. This will take effect on the middle of October 2006.

Hoorays. Hahahahahs.

One leaked image of my first blogskin. LoL.

I'm jaded. I'm exhausted. I don't know what to do. I'm blank. My trials are just next week and I hate it. My theory exams are just around the corner and I'm really weak at it. I can't seem to remember a single damn thing about it. Will I pass, or will it be vice versa? Heaven knows.I'm worried, very very worried. I might flop in my both exams and I'll end up with disappointment. I can't seem to understand anything about it. I'm scared - I might fail this time. I don't want my money to go to the drain. I'm trying to be dauntless but I can't. *gasps* Uh I hate to face this kind of situation. It is so bloody annoying. Goodness, am I in living hell or what? With all these stress, pressure and so many bloody problems bugging me, I don't know how to cope. I'm trying real hard, I'm giving my heart out, but then all my efforts are unavailing. I want my efforts to be paid off. Desperately. But will I get to experience this moment of joy? Tomorrow? Next year? Or never? Perhaps so. I'm at my wit's end. I lost my trust and assurance. How am I suppose to be confident when I've faced failures multiple times. After several failed attempts, everything's meaningless to me.

I hate life. Life sucks.

I'm flabbergasted. My oral tests are all over and I'm officially free now! Yay! Too bad that my trials are coming up soon. Hope I'll do well in it. So far school's fine. Ever since the Italian guy came to our school, he has been treated like a superstar. You know. Everyone stares and gazes at him, with amazement in their eyes. Perhaps they've never seen a blondie before. Well oh well. He's good looking, tall, friendly and whatever you can think of. Many girls love stalking him for no reason. Of course, flirty girls with raging hormones. They chase after him, asking him for his email and flirt endlessly. Imagine how pathetic it is. It's so obvious that they are bootlicking him just because he's cute. They surround him like a paparazzi, and they behave like a prick-teaser who's on heat. I apologise if I'm being too harsh. Sigh. Flirty girls who can't get a life tend to get on my nerves all the time. Ahh, don't wanna bother about that any longer. Frightens me. Trust me, he's good-looking and tall BUT I'm not crazy over him. I repeat again, I'm NOT mad about him. It's just that I admire him. Haha. xP Girls, don't waste your time flirting with him as perhaps he's already attached. Come on girls, don't flirt anymore because your efforts are futile. It's no point wasting your precious time on frivolous pursuits. ^^

Hmm. There's nothing much to blog here actually. I love collecting hair clips. Don't know why. Clips with gems/stones and plastic clips are lovely. Hahaha. My collection of hair clips has reached 70 and it is still increasing. (= I don't care how much the hair clips cost. If it's pretty, I'll definitely buy it - regardless the price. Haha. It's so amusing to see my huge collection of hair clips. Apparently, I'm currently waiting for the new stock of hair clips. WoooooT! ;D Can't wait for it. The lady who sells cute and exquisite clips always gives me discount. ^^ So charitable hor! Love all my hair clips. Love gazing at it. I appreciate it loads! Even the cheap cheap ones which cost a few dollars. And I really take care of my clips which has gems/stones on it. I can't afford to lose it. Not even one single gem. Most of it is expensive! Don't mean to brag here. => Sometimes clips can fetch to a whooping 20 bucks or more. But nevermind, I'm willing to sacrifice. Hahahaha! XD So dearly-won man! (=

No doubt that we've won the debate! Hahahah. Of course I'm the opposition. The opposition members consist of me and Jasmine. The topic we were suppose to talk on is 'Is it right for teenagers to be in love during schooling?' Yes, we received unfavourable judgements from many of our classmates who are actually in a BGR (Boy-Girl Relationship). They booed me but that was what made me stronger! (8

Hmmm. So many people whom I can't stop complaining today. Not cursing ok. Cursing's bad. So sick of this particular someone, in my choir, who's so obnoxious. Just because she's pretty (As for me she isn't), she tends to be rude all the time. SO WHAT if she is my friend's girlfriend? Do I look like I care? I symphatize my friend at times. How could he fall for a girl like that?! These days she has been testing my patience. Yesterday, when I conducted for my choir, she sulked (Grr!), she stood out and walked away. WHAT IS SHE TRYING TO DO???!?! Once she stepped on my shoe and she did not apologize! Stewwpid ! Her voice sucks too. Our choir instructor said that she sings like a kindergarten student. True enough. I actually called her a bitch before. Ooops! But now I don't. It's not good. I don't really hate her. I just dislike her at times.

My Mathematics teacher asked me to redo my graphs. Ahhhhhh! So many graphs! She didn't even go in details of it and she proclaims that she has done so. Grrr! My Mathematics teacher has PMS almost every single day, therefore, we always face the music. I can't even stand the clothes she wears! So aunty and flirty! Imagine this. Once she wore a tight and bright coloured top with a white, tight (really tight) and super duper mini skirt. Her undergarments could be seen - with the naked eye! It was so obvious! She wore black undergarments. I bet she's trying to woo guys. So gross man! Yerrr! X_x Her sense of style is so aunty. Anyway, she has a good body shape albeit she loves to show off. Her voice is so oh-my-goodness-so-childish. Can't stand her though! But I have to bear with her :(

At times I want to be loved and at times I feel that I should be concentrating more on my studies. At times I feel lonely and at times I feel that being single is more carefree. At times I feel that I should take another step further and at times I feel that I should stay stationary. At times I want to try another time and at times my mind stops me from doing so because I don't want the same thing to happen again. At times I tell myself to leave everything to God and at times I'm being impatient. At times I feel like I need to be loved and at times I feel that this is not the right time. At times I feel that it is right to be in a relationship and at times I feel that it isn't. So what's my answer?

Perhaps yes. Perhaps no. Dunno. I seriously don't know =.="