we're breaking free

Praise the Lord! I'm feeling real happy right now, due to some particular reasons. Hahahz. Don't feel like mentioning it though. By the way, let's get a little mundane today as I have nothing much to post here. I faced the music today. @= But then, I was back to my old self when I went shopping with my mom right after music class. Haha! Well, not really shopping. Bought a pair of sneakers, some hair accessories and a few tops only. Sad! Anyway, at least I could fulfill my wish. I can't resist my shopping temptation any longer. It's been killing my insanity.

I fell sick yesterday. Sobs. Got a slight fever, a baaaaaaaad sore throat and a horrible running nose! Eeee! My condition worsened today. Due to unforeseen cirucmstances, I'm not able to attend the youth concert. Grr! It's as frustrating as it sounds. But nevermind. I pray that everyone will open their heart and receive Jesus as their Saviour. God does make miracles happen. There's nothing my God cannot do. Praise Him for He has done such great things! =)

God has answered a part of my prayer. I asked Him yesterday and I got what I wanted today. God listens to my prayers. He really does. My problems are all gone - vanished into thin air. It shall not conquer my emotions again. Many good things happened today, and its obvious that I'm in a hyper mood right now. (= I wanted to bring my friend (the girl whom I encountered problems with) to the concert. But then, I could'nt go because I was sick. At that particular moment, I told her that I couldn't go because I was really ill. At first she took a long time to reply. I thought she was really angry because I told her on the very last minute. Guess what. Prayers are powerful! She told me that it's okay. She said she understands my situation. At first she hesitated, but then, after explaining, she finally believed me. Phewww. Suprising! God has answered another part of my prayer. He's such a loving God. =)

I'm OK now. PMR is getting nearer and I'm still counting the days. I'm trying not procrastinate. (: I have to study real hard. I can't read novels anymore. I'm resorted to reading revision books. Boring and uninteresting! Books make me sleepy. Novels are exceptional ;). But I have no choice! I still have to read it. Sigh! No matter what, I'll reach for the star. I'll be soaring and flying. There's not a star in heaven that I can't reach. All things are possible through Christ. Have Faith. Trust and believe. (=

I'm waiting for more good things to happen, or in other words, I'm waiting for miracles to happen. Someday it'll happen. It might be tomorrow. Nobody knows. But I truly believe that God's timing is perfect. Whatever that happens in the future remains a mystery.

I will always have my Faith in Him. (=

Friendship on the rocks. Feeling all weary in the inside but I'm glad that I have forgiven her. I know, she has a strong intense dislike for me even though she doesn't really show it. Trust me, a woman's instinct is always right. All the bad things that happened to me were indeed hurtful. It left a wound in my heart and it is currently healing. Nevertheless, I'm trying to change but they keep criticizing and condemning me. They say that I'm a chauvinist, yes, I admit. I'm trying to turn into a new leaf and yet, nobody's supporting me and when I give them a point-blank confrontation, they say that I'm still unwilling to change. I feel hurt and depressed as I have to face the harsh reality of this world. I'm willing to change, and I'm trying real hard, but nobody's supporting me. It feels so distressing when the whole world isn't on your side. You are in solitude and nobody is there to listen to your problems. At this crucial point of your life, you feel like hindering yourself from every single thing. They are pushing me to the extend and they keep criticizing me. I'm sick of listening to all the unfavourable judgements and sarcastic remarks. Every word acts like a sharp razor blade that silently cuts and poisons my fragile heart. It's so sickening.. Enough is enough.

At times, they always think that they're right but they're not. And when I tell them so, they say I'm wrong and I'm back to my old ways. Self-centered and a chauvinist. To be frank, I'm tired of thinking of everybody's feelings when they don't even think of mine. I have no choice. Now, I have to be self-dependant because I'm seriously very very tired. I can't bear any longer. Its difficult to build the trust between us. Somehow there will be a gap/distance between us. This incident hurted me real deep, but I'm glad that I'm much closer to God. Its normal for humans to feel sad, and I admit that I'm feeling sad, but soon I'll get over it. Iit's just a matter of time. For someday I'll be back stronger and tougher. =)

Thanks to Andrea for helping me all these while. My one and truly God-sent angel! Ahaks! Hey girl thanks for all the comforting words. You were there when I was about to fall and hit the ground. I've thought about this a thousand times and I finally made a decision. Yupp, I have forgiven her. Even though she doesn't really realise it, but I have already forgiven her. Well, this left a deep impact in my life. All these bad things happened all of a sudden. No, I'm not complaining. God puts me into these kinds of predicaments because He wants me to grow stronger. He wants me to be mature. We learn from trial and errors. I'm glad it is finally over. Yes, I can't expect much from non-believers. Though I don't agree with them sometimes, but I will still treat them like the way I used to. To forgive is to forget. I will not hold any grudges.

After this incident, I have realised that I'm much closer to God. The devil is trying to pull me away from God and I'm fighting the battle. My relationship with God will never drift apart. Tomorrow I'll be attending Calvary's Youth Concert and I really do hope that I'll have an amazing experience. I wanna have fun there and I wanna be touched by the Lord again. It feels good. I so wanna experience it again! By the way, I'm bringing my friend whom I had problems with. Problems aside and I'm hoping that she'll be saved too. Forget all the grudges and pray for the best to happen. I have Faith in the Lord! Everything is possible through Christ! =)

Perhaps I'm OK right now, after spilling the beans. I am always at ease after blurting out everything. I'm currently trying to accept the things I cannot change. If God brings me to it, He will definitely bring us through it. God is faithful forever ; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. He brought the sunshine in, and turned the dark to day and made the shadows flee away. He opened my eyes to a new and living way, the dawning of a brand new day. Amen!

Tomorrow = Salvation! ^^

[ Thank You Jesus for Your love. Thank You for dying on the cross to save us! Thank You for loving me all these while and watching me from heaven all the time. Even though I have failed You many times, but You never failed me. Not even once! You did not leave me alone. You were with me all the time! Thank You for healing me. Thank You so much for everything You have done for us. Thank You for Your blessings! Lastly, thank You for everything! Love ya Jesus! ^^ ]

Fine. We lost. Yesterday was the day where our hearts shatterred into tiny bits. You might ask, how we lost. I don't really know what the reason is, but I'm certainly pissed off by the stupid amateur-cum-judges. First of all, this is totally unfair for us and CBN did not deserve to win the first place. 'Why?', you might ask. I admit, they're good. They sang pretty well yesterday but their ugly attitude was what made me so damned angry of them. They despised us. They hate us. Fine, I don't care as I hate them too. They said out choir costume sucked. Mind you, at least, we're wearing a Kebaya. Unlike you guys, wearing some awful purple cheapskated janitor/toilet cleaner clothes. When you guys entered the toilet, I thought you guys were the toilet cleaners. Sorry, but I cannot differentiate between you people and the toilet cleaners of the building. You guys look EXACTLY THE same because you all were wearing almost the same uniform. =) CBN-ers aka Chicken backside nutcases did not have any showmanship. You guys did not give a hand of applause to your opponents. Instead, you gave us a silly and a horrible sulking face which is absolutely childish and absurd. Your pianist sucks because she thinks that she has it all and of course, she definitely loves blowing her own trumpet. She spoke to us with desperate menace. Blarh! I'm not scared, duh. To sum up, CBN-ers are just a load of bitches and rubbish. Nonsensical.

VI sang pretty well. They were good, well, mediocre I should say. As usual, you guys sang with rounded voice but your lifeless expressions pulled you down. I pondered for a while to think whether you people are robots or something like that because you guys don't seem to have any expression at all. It's just ...uninteresting or in other words, B-O-R-I-N-G.

Cheras did horribly yesterday. Whatever they sang was out of pitch. Sorry guys, but you guys really sucked yesterday. But anyway, you guys are way better than CBN. To be frank, your costume was awkward. Erm..you guys do not have to tell us that, because your costumes itself screams the word U-G-L-Y. Overall, you guys are great anyway. Forgive me if I'm a little harsh and rude here. (=

Alright.. St Marians oh St Marians. Well, beware, spoilers ahead. Your performance yesterday was satisfactory. Your first song wasn't up to the level which I expected. Your second song was way better than the first, but it was messy and there was NO rounded voice. You know, in a choir, you're supposed to sing with a ROUNDED VOICE. Bear in mind that this is NOT a solo competition. We're singing as a family. In a nutshell, you guys did OK. I apologise if there are any St Marians here. But..I'm just telling you the truth. No doubt that you guys did not deserve the 3rd place. Criticism makes someone stronger, emotionally and physically.

Alright.. talking about the beloved so-called-professional judges. Oh my, I just could not stand the pathetic sight of you people. I feel so disgusted. Oh yes, we received some unfavouravle judgements. Certainly not encouraging. Now, I proudly present the bird-brained judges to you. *claps claps*. The first judge, bla-bla-bla (name undisclosed to protect privacy), who is a miserable teacher from a primary school. The second judge, ble-ble-ble, a staff who works in the for-dummies-club (again, name undisclosed to protect privacy). *mourns lamentably*. Lastly, the third judge. I mean, a real judge. An unknown-and-never-heard-of musician. Nevermind, he's a musician anyway. But yes, sadly, majority always win. 2 novices vs 1 professional. Who wins? Of course, majority rules over minority. What a sad sight huh... It was definitely unfair for us. Based on my observations, the other 2 judges judged us by our looks and how entertaining our performance was, and NOT the quality of our voice. 'Fark them!' was what I said when I got to know about it. 1001 questions came across to my mind. At that moment, I felt like venting my anger by throwing tantrums. Soon, tears flowed down. My eyes were drowned in tears and sadness. An euphoric atmosphere turned melancholic all of a sudden. We could'nt help it. Our sweat and effort vanished into thin air.

And..this really annoyed me. I truly believe that the judges are racists. Both same schools won for both categories. How could that be? For the primary school category, the chinese school did much much better than the so-called-winners. They had extraordinary good voice, and my goodness, their performance was really wonderful. But.. the so-called-winners for the primary school category are real brats. Self-aggrandizing braggarts. The moment the MC announced that they were the winners, they jumped in joy (as if they were levitating) and screamed hysterically. ARGH! Can't they just STFU?? The whole auditorium triggered as if an earthquake strucked our country. I felt like giving them a tight slap and asking them to shut their bloody mouths for once and for all.

Well, CBN-ers, congratulations to you anyway. But then, when you guys step to the finals, do not be too confident. Hm.. Sam Tet has got my vote. Sorry, CBN-ers, I'm not supporting you. (= You might think that I'm an arrogant rascal but I don't really care about it. You can call me a bitch, well, again, I don't give much damnation about it. I wish you guys all the best, but then, the other states are going to kick your asses. You'll end up with tears and bruises. No, I'm not jealous. No, I'm not shunning you guys either. No, I'm not cantankerous. To love with freedom of speech, this is my blog.. Insulting me here will make you sound real stupid.

Hate this post? Sue me then. (=

Alright, everything ends here. Au revoir~

Sorry for the foul language. I truly apologise to all my readers out there. =)

XKP: You know, you should'nt bring your mobile phone to school.
Jay: Who cares? Its not mine anyway. It belongs to WJ and school is over for her as her mom has taken her report card.
XKP: After all, its still the rule. You have to obey it.
Jay: Come on, who cares about it right now? Today isn't a school day actually. So? Why does it bother you so much?
XKP: You are not allowed to bring your mobile phone. No matter what, it is still the rule. Don't do it again.
Jay: ...............you f*king b**** ~whispers softly~

Argh. I seem to hate every single thing about today. We had school today. Miserable. I hate it. My whole family scolded me because I did badly in my exams. I hate it. My teacher complained about me. I felt intimidated. I hate it. XKP annoyed me terribly. I hate it. My mom nagged from A to Z. I hate it. I couldn't find my ink pad and my stamp. I hate it. They said I'm someone who doesn't care about her future. I hate it. My teacher counted my marks wrongly and everything went haywire. I hate it. People love to vent their anger on me. They assume that I'm a punchbag which in the truth is, I'm not one and I hate it. What a day. This is the worst day in my whole entire life. 8th of July is the day which everything went terribly wrong and I have three words to say - I hate it.

For the past few days, I have been using profanity quite often. I don't know why, and I would like to know why. My mouth speaks faster than my mind in fact. I'm in a semi-depressed state right now. Due to the fact of not getting sufficient sleep and naggings from A to Z, non stop, my mood is ruined. Imagine tasting a pot of broth which has 100 spoons of salt. That describes my mood. At times I feel that the whole world does not understand me. I rather depend on myself than to depend on others as they are reluctant to lend a hand. They just love criticizing and hurting me with harsh words. Sigh. Tsk Tsk.

Alright, talking about happy things. Lets get a little mundane today. I skipped choir and my English class yesterday just to celebrate WK's birthday in KLCC. Watched Superman aka the hottie lengzai. Had dinner at Nando's and their service was poor. The stupid waiter could not even understand a single word of English. The worse thing is, he was sulking and giving us sour faces. Hello, we're your customers. You are suppose to give us a smile and NOT a stupid ugly long face with your scary eyes rolling. Aren't you guys suppose to have good manners? About the courtesy-thingy campaign which the newspaper mentioned, I don't think it'll work. No enthusiasm. How are we going improve if you have this kind of atrocious attitude? People like you bring down the image of our country, and guess what. I would be the happiest human on earth if you people are exiled to another planet. You people disgust me.

I have successfully broken the habit of procrastinating. I decided to ponder a while about what my mom scolded me for. It gave me a smack on my face. Bought so many revision books ranging from A to Z, and the bill came to a whooping RM82. It is worth the money, providing I have straight A's in my major examination this year. Yuppe, you've got it right. No more blogging, no more online-ing that frequent anymore. I've got to control it although I have the urge of surfing the net burning in me. My major examination falls on October and by the time it is over, my birthday is here. Yayy.

I just realised that the things which I dislike far outweighs the things which I like. Don't ask me why. No doubt I'm fussy. 1 more hour to go and the 8th of July will end. Hip Hip Hooray. Yuppe, Germany is gonna win. By the way, France will grab the World Cup title. Ole Ole.

Allez Les Bleus!

Take a look on this. It is something worth spending your time on =). Click on the Typedrawing icon and a window will pop out. Click enter and the gallery will appear. On your right column, click on the requested TYPEDRAWING. Check it out my fellow aye loyal readers! Thats all, have fun!



Bah bah bah.

By the way, piecesofbits.blogspot.com rocks! ;)

Euphoria engulfs me. Yayyyyyy =) It is because :

1. My choir is in the finals! Yayyyyyy! We did pretty well. There were some blunders, of course, but we managed to cover it as if nothing happened. hahahaha =)
2. I'm back to normal. I'm not ill anymore! Thank You Jesus for healing me. You have given me Faith and assurance. I'm healed, 100% healed! Amen~!
3. I have finished David Klass's You Don't Know Me. The ending was rather unexpected, as I predicted that John would choose Glory Hallelujah. But he didn't. He did not choose Glory Hallelujah or Violent Hayes.

David Klass's You Don't Know Me was tastefully done. It was near to perfection.I liked the whole story. His good command of English made me fell in love with it. His style of writing was hilarious, and that made me so obsessed with the book. haha. Every page was well written. Sentence after sentence, it is a joy to read.
My Rating : 8.5/10

Some of the choir members from other schools are indeed very bossy, arrogant and stupid. dumb, dumb and dumb. Some of them are just newbies and they act like they're some kind of expert in this. Some didn't want to tell us their school name because they fear that... Well, that is really stupid and childish. Ahhhh~ *gasps* CBN's pianist totally sucked. She thinks that her two ponytails looked cute. In fact, it looked horrible! *pukes* Urgh, get a life. She is so fugly that the government moved Halloween to her birthday. I know I should'nt be doing this. Aishhh~ She's good at piano. I admit, but her egotism really freaks me out. *shrugs* The reason why I'm doing this is because.. (refer to the post below, on the 1st paragraph, the 8th line). =) This is my blog, and insulting me or my choir members is like giving me a tight slap and telling me I should't respond. Before you leave an angry comment, read the blog entry at least twice to make sure you understand what I am saying, or accusing me will just make you sound really stupid. If reading it twice is too tedious for your brain, I suggest you should just step aside.. ^^


Till then. I need to find more information about the New Longman Literature series as they don't sell it in Malaysia. I loved every series of it though. Overwhelming. Well.. Every cloud has a silver lining, right? *grins*